My mom’s death has made me hyper aware of a lot of things, particularly anything that is remotely not typical for the dogs. Case in point: Roxy began coughing a few days ago. She’s still energetic and eating fine and I think it might be allergies, since it clears up with Benadryl. I just can’t lose her, not so soon after Mom died.
It’s been hard getting and maintaining the energy for anything. I try to conserve as much energy as I can for work and I’m always exhausted when I get home. But even though I’m tired, it’s still hard to fall and stay asleep. I just want things to go back to normal, but I don’t even know what that means anymore.
I’ve been sleeping on the couch for the last week. I just can’t bear to be in my room anymore than I need to right now. It probably has to do with the fact that piles of my mom’s clothes are waiting to be sorted and donated and both pieces of furniture in there were hers.
I’m just trying to make it through each day.