Day 346

Tonight is the first night of Hanukkah. I love buying a new hanukiyah each year and I look forward to lighting the candles and taking a few minutes to reflect on the last Jewish holiday of the secular calendar. This year has been transformative in a lot of ways, some good and some not so great, but I feel like I have taken a giant step forward. This year has shown me that I’m much stronger than I’ve ever been, even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes. As lonely as I feel sometimes and as much as I question my place in the community, I know I’m surrounded by many wonderful people who care about me. I don’t question whether or not I should be Jewish anymore, which is huge. For me to be so certain of this is miraculous in itself since I’m always second-guessing my decisions.

Overall, there isn’t much I would change about my life and that is a true Hanukkah miracle.